Litter Bugs!

Yesterday, on my walk to the bus, I was struck by the amount of trash on our street, and the surrounding streets, and in the neighborhood in general. Disgusting. Infuriating!
 As a child I was part of a group at school that would pick up litter on the city streets. A teacher organized it, and I remember walking down Santa Monica Boulevard with trash bags and gloves. We were in elementary school, and we did not get credit for picking up trash. The teacher, I'm sure, didn't get paid extra for this labor. He did it, we did it, because we didn't want to see trash on our streets.

When I think about doing something like that today,  I know it would never be allowed. There's too much traffic now, and liability. I have done beach clean up with some of my classes, and it is satisfying. The children really love it, and there is a genuine sense of pride. That's the way I felt when we would do our street clean ups at school. Proud and responsible.

 The boys and I pick up trash when we see it, and we are quite diligent about it. However, where our street is concerned we have a problem: There is a junior high school down the block. Day after day, I watch kids stuff wrappers in our bushes, or drop paper as they pass. I can't imagine caring so little about the environment that I would just release whatever it was I was holding and leave it on the ground. It just seems so rude. And thoughtless. I wonder if their parents litter too, or if they would tell them not to drop their crap on the ground? I hope so, but I'm guessing no.

Outfit:

I was staying home except for a jaunt to the neighbor's house where a birthday celebration was taking place. When I searched through my drawers, I found this lovely top that I used to wear all the time. At some point it got stained, so I sewed these little red flowers on it that did not wash very well. I don't know why I've kept this top, I can't remember the last time I wore it... Maybe because it doesn't take up a lot of space?!

Top: Purchased in some small New York store ages ago. "Flowers" from Joanne's Fabrics.

Jeans: Big Sunday

Shoes: Fit Flops

New Parent Dinner!

In just mere moments I will be hopping on the bus with HaHa in order to get to school to do some work, pick up the boys, get them fed and off to Aunt Janine's, and meet Richard for our "New" parent dinner tonight. Leo is entering Kindergarten in the fall, so the school has a dinner for all of the kindergarten parents. We did it last year for Charlie, so we hardly feel new, but that's another story.

I wasn't sure what I wanted to wear for the dinner, something nice but somewhat casual. I found the perfect shirt, but didn't know what to pair it with. I decided I would wear a combo I've never worn before: Pink and Khaki. Now, I only have khakis because my generous cousin gave me two brand new (with the tags still on!) pair. I like them, and they are a great staple. Since I didn't want to wear the shirt all day, I opted to wear this "cover up" while I am doing my mom stuff. That way, I hope to preserve the integrity of the blouse.

I got this blouse at Goodwill for about 5 bucks. I have an addiction to anything sparkly and strange. I had to have it, and it has been sitting in my closet unworn for over a year. Gotta go! The Big Blue Bus beckons!!!

Outfit:

Cover up: From Cousin. Mossimo. She gave me two of these too!

Pink shirt: Goodwill.

Khakis: From cousin. Gap.

Shoes: Mossimo

Goodwill!

This morning, as I drove Leo and HaHa to the beach for a field trip, I happened to end up behind a Goodwill truck. There it was in the gray, gray light, telling me to carry on with my ridiculous project.  "Do not be discouraged", it said. "Keep on Trucking!" I love little signs from the universe like this.

When I woke up to get ready for the beach it was cold and overcast and I thought I might have a message on my cell phone saying "trip canceled." I did not. So we headed West. Much to my surprise, many of the kids were in their bathing suits, and they got wet! I, of course, was freezing, and I was happy I had a jacket and a scarf to throw over my sweater and "beachy" top. We had a great time, and the sun came out just when it was time for the children to go home!

I took the long way home. As we drove we passed a shop I had never seen before called Essential Chocolate. At the same exact moment on NPR's Bookworm a writer said the words "Essential, existential loneliness." My brain immediately linked essential-chocolate-loneliness. Could this be another sign?

Outfit:

Orange Sweater: From cousin. Mossimo.

Shirt: Old Navy. I got this in MA, a couple of summers ago when I was visiting my mom. I was pregnant which seems to have been a fertile shopping time for me!

Jeans: Big Sunday. Bu from Malibu Jeans.

Shoes: Fit Flops.

HaHa loved being with the older kids! Even in the freezing cold!

Double Duty!

As I was crawling into bed this morning at 5:50, my friend Erin was enjoying the very wee hours with her little ones. She got up at 5:20, to be exact. So there we were, two ships passing in the dawn. The night owl and the early bird, both inspired not only by our own natures, but by our little chickies. I won't go into the whole story of why I was up so late, but I will say that HaHa was up for two hours in the middle of the night. I comforted her, gave her water, rubbed her back, and put on music, but after about an hour I left her crying in her crib and went back downstairs to finish up some work. Imagine my surprise when I heard cries of "Mah-mah... mah-mah" approaching! Haha was apparently lifted out of her crib by her 5 year old brother. I had thrown in the towel, but her brother said, "H to the N mom. You're not gonna' leave this cryin' child in my room!"

So I held her, and she slowed me down. I waited a while then I gingerly placed her back in her crib. I finished my work, made lunches, sent a few emails, brushed my teeth, then lay my heavy head down at 5:50 a.m! The phone rang 10 minutes later, but I couldn't sub today because I had an appointment. Part of me wondered if I could have gone to work without sleeping at all. Probably not a good idea. It does make me wonder. I guess this is part of getting old. I can't do all-nighters anymore.

HaHa called me from her crib at 8:30. My outfit today reflects my fatigue and lack of inspiration. It also had two lives. My original creation ended up getting changed back to a more subdued outfit, because I was cold, and didn't feel up to whimsy. Blame it on the lack of zzz's!

Oh! The highlight of my day was getting to meet my amazing friend's new baby girl! She is beautiful and sweet and she had that new baby smell!

Outfit:

Embroidered Shirt: Thrift store. This is actually the bottom half of a dress I cut in two. I tied the ends to create the "top".

Grey sweater: From cousin. A comfy staple for me. I've worn it quite a bit, so I decided to wear it in a "new" way.

Jeans: Big Sunday. Bu from Malibu.

Shoes: Predictions.

See the double bags under the eye?!

Backtraking!

I realized after I re-read my post from yesterday, that I implied that the American couple in the movie were over-involved in their child's life.Which they absolutely were not. They seem like a really amazing couple and family, and, I have an insider tip that they had their baby at home and helped to start a co-op pre-school! So how's that for kicking some parenting butt?!  I also implied that American parents aren't interested in their kids, which, of course, is another absurd thing to say. I meant to say that just because two of the moms in the film were less "involved", they still were interested. I also realize that I should avoid generalizations. Always. Of course, I know many non- over-involved-yet-still-interested American parents of American kids.


What really struck me in the film were the sibling relationships and the way the Mongolian and Namibian mother seemed to not get too involved. Obviously, sibling rivalry/relations are on my mind. In Babies, the American and Japanese children do not even have siblings, so again, I should have chosen my words more carefully. I guess we see what we want to see in everything, and I honed in on the the two moms I wish I was more like!  Now, the Namibian mom does have 9 children, so maybe experience has made her wiser.

So the lesson I learn is to NOT make sweeping generalizations, and to not write posts of a critical nature in haste! Please forgive me if I did offend and kindly disregard yesterday's post! And go see Babies if you want to see an interesting film!

Outfit:

Wrap shirt: Same as yesterday. Thrift store.

Red dress: Goodwill. Old Navy. Seen in: Riddle of the Jinx! and Reality Check! (worn as skirt in both) I guess this is my third time wearing this! I'm going to have to start keeping count... but that's another project!

A line Coral skirt: Thrift store. I've worn this a bunch too. Seen in: The Pacific! and We are All Hypocrites! and Showers!

Shoes: American Eagle.

Babies!

I took all three kids to see Babies today. My cousin Taylor went with me, so it was much more pleasant than it might have been without her. The kids were fine, but they got a little restless close to the end of the film. It is 80 minutes long with no dialogue, and it has a pretty slow pace. Plus, it started right near lunchtime, so I think they became quite peckish. HaHa did okay, all things considered, but she did leave the theater twice. I guess she just needed to move. This was the first movie she's seen in a theater and I hope it sets a precedent!

It was interesting to see how parenting is managed in different parts of the world. It definitely made me realize that I think American parents are much more "involved" with their kids. And I don't mean interested. I mean I think we are more prone to intervening and managing our kids social and emotional lives. This can have both positive as well as negative outcomes. But I could be completely wrong. Maybe I am just too involved with my kids' behavior and trying to control it. I think I have raised pretty independent children, and I don't coddle them, but I do get involved when they have conflicts and bad behavior. Maybe I need to take a step back in these situations. I don't know. But Babies definitely made me think about it!

I have some summer school deadlines to meet, so I must end my post here! As per usual, I am the queen of procrastination! Will I ever learn?

Outfit:

Print Shirt: From cousin. Forever 21. I am wearing backwards. Seen regular style in: Showers!

Brown Wrap knit shirt: Thrift store. Very old. I don't remember when I got this, or where!

Jeans: Goodwill. Gap.

Shoes: Predictions.

Sex ATC!

Okay. Although it pains me to admit it, every time I see an add for the new Sex and the City movie, I get a little giddy and I actually watch it rather than fast forward through it. When I lived in New York, I never saw a SATC episode. For starters, I didn't have a TV, and second, it just wasn't of interest to me. I even babysat for a woman who would constantly tell me that her best friend was one of "the producers of Sex and the City!" I would just nod my head enthusiastically and smile while thinking, "So what?" Later on I would look up said friend, and sure enough there she was on the credit list.

I also had a friend who was an extra on an episode and though I was happy that she had gotten some work, it didn't really matter that it was on that show. Again, I had no connection to the show, so I congratulated her and we moved on in the conversation. I didn't grill her about the cast, or Patricia Field, or being on set. Cut to March, 2001. I move from New York back to Los Angeles after 10 years of living in the Big Apple. 10 crazy and important years. Years I grew from girl to woman. Starting as an NYU freshman and ending up as a single pre-school teacher and nanny. I learned so much about life and myself in those year, and I had a lot of fun.

So it's  March 2001, I'm back in L.A. and I'm living with my mom and step dad thanks to NYU's exorbitant tuition that ate through my "moving to L.A." savings account. (But that's another story.) My mom has a TV, and she has HBO. I sit down to watch an episode with her and I am instantly filled with nostalgia and palpable love for the city I just left. I'm hooked. I relate to the story line and to the ladies as well. I can't believe I've been missing out on this pop culture treat.

After Charlie was first born I was alone a lot because we had moved, I didn't drive, and my friends and family all had jobs. Lucky for me, it just so happened that HBO was showing ALL of the SATC episodes from Season One to the present season! I can't explain what a comfort it was, but it was really helpful to me at the time. It gave me a daily dose of the city, and a dose of entertainment when I needed distraction.

So why am I telling you all this? Because The Richard and I are going to see SATC tonight and I am excited even though I am fairly certain it is going to stink up the joint. I liken it to fashion porn. It will be totally gratuitous and over the top, but can't a girl have a little mindless fun every now and then?

Outfit:

Inspired by SATC. I think there's a little Carrie in it.

Shirt: Goodwill. Isabel Marant.

Blue tank: Urban Outfitters. Very Old.

Pants: Massachusetts thrift store. Mossimo.

Shoes: Patricia Field for Payless. I saw these shoes in Lucky Magazine (shopping porn). My friend gives me her old copies. I thought they were very cute and I found them a couple of months later on sale for 12 bucks! Whoo-hoo! 

HaHa is feeling better! Thank you for the kind words!

Political Parties!

Today we hosted one of our political parties in order discuss the ballot measures in the upcoming elections. We have these whenever there are state elections and Richard is the arbiter and master of ceremonies. Richard is quite knowledgeable and opinionated and the highlight is watching him debate politics while throwing back shots of booze. One year he fell down some stairs. Another year he made someone cry and leave. True story.

The political parties are the most fun when people with disparate views discuss their opinions. Or, when people dare to challenge the master of ceremonies. He can tend to be quite boorish at these things. However, we have some feisty and knowledgeable friends, who are not afraid to stand up to The Richard. Yesterday, we even had one attendee who declared "However Richard is voting, I'm voting the opposite!" In the end, she found they were actually on the same page for the most part. Her statement was really a testament to the strong emotions The Richard inspires at these parties. Perhaps it is merely that Richard is not afraid to talk openly about political matters, as many of us have been warned not to do. Or perhaps it is the booze.

The ballot measures were a breeze this time around, but we know the party for the November elections is going to be a doozy!   






Outfit:

White Shirt: Purchased long ago in a store in NY. It's got to be at least 15 years old. Matches. Believe it or not, I used to rock this bad boy all on its own, thereby showing my tum-tum, which I was quite fond of. No longer, but I wear this shirt UNDER a lot of other things.

Purple camisole: Old Navy.

Pants: Isaac Mizrahi for Target.

Shoes: janet & janet.

This is actually the first outfit I can think of where everything I am wearing was purchased in retail stores brand new.

Death and Pimples!

At some point in this day I had discussed what I was going to write about with a friend, and I was happy with the subject matter. However, it is hours into the night, and I don't remember what I was going to say. This is yet another example of my old age. How the hell am I going to remember anything in ten years?!

Oh! I remember one thing I was thinking about. Pimples. Now, I'm sure this is a subject everyone is dying to hear me pontificate about. Well, I have a good size zit on my cheek, and it has really been bothering me. I tried to "alleviate" it, but it was not willing to cooperate. I have to admit, although it is totally disgusting, that I love popping pimples! I remember being given a gift certificate for a facial one year. I lay there on the table with goop on my face, and, as the esthetician squeezed my blemishes, I told her I though it would be so fun to get to do that for a living. I think there was an awkward silence for a bit, and eventually the woman said, "There's a lot more to it than that." I think I unwittingly insulted her, but I was really just trying to let her know I thought she had a really cool gig. 

Anyway, one of the last memories I have of my grandmother is visiting her in a nursing home and looking at her as she lay in her bed. She was somewhat out of it, so I really studied her face and her features. At some point I noticed a HUGE blackhead on her chin and I knew it was one of those types of craters that would deliver a copious amount of stuff. I kept staring at it and I really wanted to ask my grandma if I could squeeze it. But I didn't. It just didn't seem like the right thing to do. My grandmother was sick, and she was a pretty crabby lady. I'm sure it would have just pissed her off if I tried to grab her face and squeeze her zit. But it would have been fun for me!


Outfit:

For the past few nights, when I've put on my pajamas, I've thrown this gray sweater on because it's been somewhat chilly. It is so cozy, and it was given to me by my cousin (like many other things I've worn this year). Yesterday, she wrote an excellent post titled: One Closet, Many Years where she commented on the amount of things she has given me!


Sweater: From Cousin. Mossimo.  I needed comfort today so I opted to wear this out.

Tank: Old Navy.


Skirt: Marshall's. I got this skirt in 1988 when I was visiting my best friend in Texas. I didn't wear it for a very long time, but now it is one of my summer staples. It is perfect for travel because it can't wrinkle and it can be worn several different ways.


Shoes: zoe & zac.

Necklace: This is actually a bracelet that I have attached to a necklace. I highly recommend trying this at home. You might come up with some really cool "new" jewelry!

HaHa is still sick. Here she is sitting in Daddy's arms on the couch. I nursed her practically the whole night and was exhausted today.

Fever!

HaHa is with fever, so I am holding her and trying to type, and it really isn't going well. I think that despite Richard's mandate, I may have to take a pass. I have 218 more days of this blogging stuff, so surely a day or two of slackin' is warranted, Right?  And right now, I am not slackin', I'm comforting and mothering. Of course, as is usually the case, HaHa started crying the moment I picked up my computer.

Maybe instead of reading my blatherings you could go to two other blogs that I have been enjoying immensely of late. One is called Mad on a Gray Sea and the other is called 12x12. They are both written by women who are far more intelligent and useful than me. They can actually grow food and bake bread and make yogurt and stuff. All I can do is tell you how to layer an outfit!  They are excellent writers and very intelligent people so check 'em out! Baby HaHa beckons!

Outfit:

After nursing and holding HaHa all day, I had to get dressed in a flash to get the boys. My primary goal was not repeating, of course. I started with this skirt, worn as a shirt, and built up.

Skirt: Thrift store. Seen in Open House.

Jeans: From Big Sunday sale.

Sweater: Hand me down from friend. H&M.

Shoes: Fit Flops.

Appreciation!

So now, every time I write, I have a little monkey on my back going "Is this interesting? Is this smart? Is this worth writing?" I must say, that while I have enjoyed getting this little project off the ground, there are some days I just don't have much to say. This is how the Topics! conversation came up with Richard the other night. He has given me a "No writing about not having anything to write about!" mandate, so I will pull something out of my a-, I mean hat.

How about appreciation? Yesterday I was visiting with a friend, and while we were chatting she got a call from one of her buddies. This other friend stopped by, and it turned out that we had met before, because we have yet another friend in common.  She had been at my house years ago when we were throwing a party for Charlie. What a small world!

She also has a son, and her son is nearly the same age as Charlie. Her son, like my sons, can be a bit challenging with his behavior sometimes, and we commiserated about this. Her son, unlike my sons, was diagnosed with Leukemia last year. When she said this, I was so surprised I did not know what to say. What could I say that would sufficiently illustrate how deeply sorry I was to hear this? That showed I could not imagine how truly painful it must be to endure watching your child suffer? I found some words, but mostly I felt like a jerk for complaining about my boys' bad listening, and less than charming qualities, while she actually had something to complain about.


Which leads me back to gratitude.  I must remember to appreciate ALL of the qualities of my children. The good and the bad, because they are children, and they are learning, and they are imperfect, and they are perfect, and they are my babies, and they are human, and they certainly have accepted me with my multitude of flaws. And, they are healthy. I must give thanks to good health. And thanks to everything in my life. Both good and bad. Yes, thanks to EVERYTHING in my life. Thank you, everything!

Outfit:

White shirt (underneath): Goodwill. Isabel Marant.

Print Shirt: Bought in the Bronx while visiting Josh and Brady! It's a bit big, but I love the print!

Brown Pants: From cousin. Gap. They still had the tags on them when she gave them to me!

Shoes: Mossimo.


I happened upon the scene below in the kitchen, and I thought it was so sweet!

Girls!

It's amazing to me the things that HaHa will do, without being asked, that the three boys won't do after being asked a million times. HaHa, little HaHa, not yet two, will pick her clothes up off of the floor after her bath and put them in the hamper. HaHa will immediately wipe up her spills when she has an accident. And my little baby HaHa says "thank you" when I do things for her all the time. It amazes me! Are girls really that advanced? Did I make a mistake in not having a girl first?

If HaHa were my eldest child, I'm sure it would like having an assistant!  She could help me with chores and take care of her little brothers, (rather than being tackled by them and led down the path of crazy-town).  HaHa would NOT have scratches all over her face because she was trying to climb the things 5 and 6 year old boys climb. She would listen to me, and understand me, and - wait, that's a lot of pressure for a kid. Too much pressure. No child deserves that. Better that HaHa be the little light that softens all of our hearts. That she follow Leo and Charlie around like a puppy and delight in them. That she grow up tough and rumble and protected and adored. Better she be the last baby. Girl.

Outfit:

I call this a "momfit", because I feel like a total mom in this. Or, that is, I feel like I look  like a mom. Maybe I always look like a mom, but sometimes less so. I mean, what does a mom look like? Maybe what I mean is a stereotypical mom...  Either way, I am actually a mom, so I guess looking like one is okay. Right?

Shirt: Hand me down from my Cousin. Converse One Star.

Pants: Thrift Store. They used to be a jumpsuit, then I cut it! I am sorry I did. Especially after seeing this season of Top Model. Did I mention that Mr.Jay was the first person to ever pluck my eyebrows?!

Shoes: Fit Flops.

Belt: Goodwill. I bought just a bit before the new year because I thought it might come in handy!

Also, just to clarify, Richard and I were not sharing our crushes or fantasy loves, he was merely telling me about a conversation he had had at work. I'm sure he won't be doing that again for a long time!

Topics!

Richard read my post yesterday and informed me that I need more topics. I usually just write about what comes to me at the time I am sitting in front of my computer. Occasionally I write about something I've been thinking about for a while, but not usually. This lack of planning is why lyrics to songs written 27 years ago appeared here a while back... I just go with the flow, and sometimes the flow is not so... flow.  

So. A topic that Richard inspired me to write about today is: "What Things Should You Not Share With Your Partner?" I think it is often implied that honesty is tantamount to intimacy. You and your loved one can only be as close as you are willing to truth tell. Well, I disagree. I think some things are better left unsaid. One of these things is: "Lindsay Lohan is the type of woman you would want to sleep with, but never date." This comment developed from a conversation Richard had with one of his co-workers. Actually, the person they were speaking about first was Tyra Banks. Then Lindsay just happened to appear on our television screen and she joined the dialogue. Now, I, of course, was disgusted because, in addition to Lindsay being so clearly troubled, she is also young enough to be Richard's daughter. Yuck! Why did he have to say that? It was such a turn off! I understand that men are visually stimulated by trashy ladies, or beautiful ladies, or sweet ladies, or just ladies, period, but I don't want know if Richard has a secret hankering for LiLO. Why? Why? Why?

Now, according to Web M.D., " Study after study illustrates that men's sex drives are not only stronger than women's, but much more straightforward." "Straightforward" means turned on by anything female with breasts! It could be female eggplant!  (Unless, of course, the men in question are gay!) Web M.D also goes on to say that, "The sources of women's libidos, by contrast, are much more difficult to pin down." And later, "It's common wisdom that women place more value on emotional connection as a spark of sexual desire". This is exactly the reason my desire went down to nilch the moment Richard told me about The Linds. And please, do not think me prude. I was not grossed out by the fact that Richard is turned on by other women, it's just that this particular woman is SO disappointing. Why couldn't he be turned on by someone more classy? Like Oprah! Oh yeah, he is, I'm sure... As long as there are breasts involved!

(Please note that I am aware that these are generalizations and do not believe that they apply to everyone!)

Outfit:

I pulled out this long forgotten gray heather-ed unitard from my drawer and added on from there. I have kept this unitard for exercise purposes, but it rarely gets used these days!

Unitard: Goodwill. Star Cody. A label that died long ago. One day I will wear this to a Jazzercise class with a headband! Ladies, don't let your unitards go to waste! 

Iron Lung Shirt: I Heart Guts.

Skirt: Walmart. George. Purchased in my mom's tiny Massachusetts town!

Sweater: Hand me down from friend.

Shoes: Airwalk.